Oi

Starting to miss having a car. I should just suck it up and buy the jumper cables tomorrow. Since unreliable people seem to be... unreliable.

Already dreading getting up at oh, 3:30 tomorrow morning. I love that I have the rest of the day to just do whatever, but I don't think one ever gets used to waking up that early.

On the agenda for this weekend...
work work work
FIND CAT LITTER
do another painting
party with Alex and friends =)
Dinner with the family? I don't know when Chris and Paul get back...
I think that's it.

Still reflecting on a while back... I used to cry for one reason or another every single day. And not just little tears, I was always a total mess. I still have occasional downer days, but I get this feeling the tides are changing in my favor. I'm totally okay with that. It's been so long since I've felt even stable. Maybe it's finally -my- time.

When you're holding me, we make a pair of parentheses

I just realized how far I've come...

Tonight Nathan is gone doing some huge work project, and probably won't be home until like 1am. I haven't heard from him, and I think his phone died.

Merely two months ago I would have been freaking out by now... crumbling under my own insecurities. But now I can look at the situation logically and say to myself, "Cool, the house will be nice and quiet". It might sound really lame, but I can see that it's becoming easier for me to be independent. And better yet, I know we're absolutely fine. Better then fine, even. Hella good.

I guess I can say I still worry about him getting home safely late at night.. but I'm allowed that one. That's just being a good girlfriend.


Also, I just drank a really big glass of milk and now I feel kind of explode-y. But that's fine too.

Tunes

Downloading some new musics..
A Fine Frenzy, Meiko, and Ultre. I'm in a folk-y mood...

Ikea-fied

Our house is starting to look less like two empty rooms with boxes and miscellaneous crap. We finally got a dresser, some neat orange paper-y lamps, and even some cacti. Not that plants really fall into the furniture category, but I was starting to feel suffocated by all the white walls. Some extra life is helping.

I actually painted today. And even though the picture I did is kind of anatomically incorrect... I just adore it. o.o Yeah, it's weird. I don't enjoy bragging, and yet I have to. I made something that makes ME happy. And while I hope other people see it and think "hey that's pretty rad", it's not all that significant. Maybe I will post a picture, but it's way too big to fit in a scanner.. so it's likely a crappy photograph will have to do.

Mild annoyances that are hard to ignore right now: no money, still having huge difficulties with sewing, various little relationship misunderstandings.. you know. Same shit. Maybe I should have stayed later today and sewed more.. but I had to do something for me. I've been working my ass off for other people non-stop for the past few days, I had to get it out. I still feel guilty about it, though. I just can't seem to jump that hurdle of understanding when it comes to sewing. Truly maddening.

Oh, and I kind of need to work on making some friends here. Seattle is pretty amazing, but I'm guessing some of it's inhabitants are, too.

Finally

It's just right.